I don't think we're in Konoha anymore, Akamaru!
by Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo
Summary: Kiba gets sucked into the wizard of oz! And he wears a dress! [On hiatus]
1. Chapter 1

**I don't think we're in Konoha anymore, Akamaru!**

**Chapter one**

Heya, It's Kyo and I think someone spiked my chocolate milk- except I've had this idea for a while. Basically, it's the wizard of Oz with Kiba as Dorothy. And miraculously, this one won't have any OCs. Enjoy, folks!

Oh, yeah, I don't own Naruto.

"Kiba, get up and do your chores!" Hana yelled. He rolled over in his bed.

"Jeez, she's so loud so early in the morning, right, Akamaru?" He asked sleepily as he sat up. "Akamaru?"

He looked around his room. Akamaru wasn't anywhere. "Akamaru?". He checked under his bed, where several interesting types of mold were growing. He checked in his closet, where he found-

"Naruto! Why the hell are you in my closet!" He yelped in surprise.

"Because this girl told me that your closet was the Hokage closet, and if I sat in it, I'd become Hokage"

"The hell? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!- Oh, wait, before that, have you seen Akamaru?"

"No"

"THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Kiba grabbed his collar and promptly threw Naruto out the window.

"Kiba, are you up yet?" Hana opened his door.

"Yeah. Oi, Nee-chan, have you seen Akamaru?"

Hana gave her brother an exasperated look. "You've lost him? He's probably out somewhere discovering the joys of squirrel-chasing. Anyways, you better find him quick, don't you have training today?"

"Yeah. We're training with the team from sand."

"Well come on and get dressed. Breakfast is on the table and I'll eat all your bacon if you don't hurry up"

"Whoever said 'Women are delicate' obviously never met you" he muttered.

"What was that? Well excuse me! You're a pathetic man yourself! You lost to that blonde kid! And you're an Inuzuka who can't even keep up with his dog! I am now officially revoking your talking privileges!"

"You can't do that!"

"You have no talking privileges! Shut up and get downstairs! And I'm eating your bacon"

He got downstairs dressed in his usual parka with fur trimming. He sat down at the table where his mother was reading the paper. "Itadakimasu! Hi mom"

"You don't have any talking privileges. Quiet"

He ate his scrambled eggs without bacon, wondering how his mother knew that Hana had revoked his talking privileges. He guessed that she'd told her. Where was Akamaru?

Just then the doorbell rang. Kiba got up to get it. He opened the door to see Kabuto holding Akamaru.

"HE BIT ME, THE LITTLE BITCH!"

"AKAMARU!"

"WOOF!"

Kabuto looked displeased at the happy emotional reunion he was witnessing. "He bit me!"

Tsume got up from the table. "Can I help you, sir? I hear that Akamaru bit you. He's a ninken. He'll do that if he perceives danger"

"I want him put to sleep!"

Tsume's eyes narrowed. You don't suggest to an Inuzuka that dogs should be put down. They don't take kindly to that. As Kabuto continued bitching, she pulled her fist back and punched him. She continued to mercilessly beat him as Team eight walked up to the front door.

"Kiba. You're late. It makes the rest of us look bad if you make us late" Shino said. Kiba scowled.

"It isn't my fault! Akamaru ran off, and then I found Naruto in my closet, and then Hana ate all my bacon! I'm bound to be a little late with that!"

Shino glared, apparent even from behind his glasses. "If you're going to lie, at least bother to make them good lies"

"But- but- I'm not lying!"

Kurenai pressed her hand to her forehead. "Kiba, we really don't have time for this. We need to go. Now"

"Fine"

They walked to the training ground on the east side of town to find Gaara looking particularly homicidal. Temari was painting her fingernails and… so was Kankuro ((WTF? Jeez, what next, Kuro-tan, are you going to murder your whole family and join Akatsuki, too?)), though to his credit, he was only doing it because his bop-it was broken. ((Don't ask. It's from a fanfic my friends wrote)).

"You're twenty minutes late. We're busy people. I myself have _things_ to do later this afternoon." Temari said disdainfully.

"Things that involve your tongue down Shikamaru's throat, I bet" Gaara murmured resentfully. He was sulking. He was used to being important; people being late to meet him was simply not something that happened to him.

"You know what, Gaara, at least I don't still have my fuckin' teddy bear. You can shut your pie hole right now" Temari gave him her best death glare.

"I don't feel like training. I'm going to go get ice cream" He jumped down from the tree branch he'd been hanging upside down from.

"Gaara!" Temari called after him warningly. He continued walking off. "Okay, well I, for one want to train. I'm working on a new move, and I need to improve it. Is that okay with you? And KANKURO! I TOLD YOU I'D KILL YOU NEXT TIME YOU GOT INTO MY DAMN NAIL POLISH!"

Thirty minutes later, Kiba was hiding in a tree house that Konohamaru and his friends had built the week before. He and Akamaru were both panting. Temari was hella scary when she was mad. Which she was at that particular moment. At least team eight had gotten a head start when she'd beaten Kankuro over the head with her fan.

"Ookaze no jutsu!" Crap. Temari's new move involved using wind-style ninjutsu with her fan's movement. Combined, they created a whirlwind, a tornado. And it was really scary. And her latest attack swept Kiba up in it. The winds pulled Kiba's tree out by the roots and sent the tree house flying through space.

As if hurtled over the trees, Kiba hit his head on the floor. When he looked up and out the window he saw Kabuto flying on a broom, cackling wildly, and… wearing a dress? But then another gale hit the house and Kiba hit his head again, this time on the ceiling. Everything went dark.

Kiba shook his head. "Whuzzgoinon?" he asked himself. Akamaru yipped. "Whaddya mean, look outside?" Kiba got out of the tree house. The place he stepped into seemed filled with rainbow colors.

"Oh, auntie Em, where am I?" he asked himself in a girlish voice. Then he seemed to regain his senses, and said "Wait, what? Who the hell is Auntie Em? Where am I? I don't think we're in Konoha anymore, Akamaru"

A cluster of vividly bright and entirely too big to be real buttercups giggled. Kiba turned. "Don't fucking laugh!" and threw a handful of kunai at the flowers.

"Gah! Konohamaru! Are you okay?" a voice in a clump of violets asked.

"WHY ARE FLOWERS TALKING TO ME? INO WAS RIGHT ABOUT FLOWERS TALKING!"

He flailed around a little until he noticed a pink bubble floating towards him. "THE HELL? Did I lick a toad or am I just going crazy?"

The bubble grew and then popped. Kurenai stood in a pink dress that resembled a wedding cake more than an article of clothing.

"Hello, little boy, where are you from?" She asked. "nd when was the last time you had a bath? In any case, the munchkins are simply laughing because you look so silly. Are you a good witch, or a bad witch?"

"Wait, hold up. What are you talking about?"

"It's really very simple, little boy. Are you a good witch or a bad witch, and where did you come from?" she asked.

"Uh… I'm a Kiba. And I come from Konohagakure no sato. Kurenai, why are you in a dress?"

"Silly little Kiba, I'm not Kurenai! I'm Glinda, the good witch of the north. In any case, you killed the wicked witch of the east, Kabuto! Now you get his shoes!"

Kiba turned around to look at where the tree house had landed. There were two feet sticking out, both shod in what had to be the tackiest red sequined sandals he'd ever seen. As soon as he took a good look at them, the shoes vanished and reappeared on his own feet.

"I don't wanna wear his girly ass shoes! I'm a firm believer in letting dead people keep their own shoes!"

"Oh, you're so cute, Kiba! Here, I have an idea!" She waved her wand. Kiba looked down to find himself wearing a dress. ((Think of the one Dorothy wears)).

"CRAP! GET ME OUT OF IT!" He yelled. Kurenai giggled until he started throwing kunai at her. Then she sighed.

"Oh well, I guess this will have to do" she waved her wand again. This time, Kiba's clothes turned into his normal pants, but he had a girly-ass shirt made of the same blue and white cloth. "Now, if you want to get home, you have to go see the Wizard of Oz, okay? Follow the yellow brick road! Now ta ta, darling, I have places to go, people to see." She was in the midst of waving her wand when a cloud of black smoke appeared.

"WHO THE FUCK KILLED MY BITCH!" the cloud yelled in an angry voice. As soon as the black smoke dissipated, Kiba could see Orochimaru in a black robish-thing, waving a broom. "I mean, I'm not complaining, but I want the fucking shoes back!"

"Too bad, Kiba got them first!" Kurenai said. "That's the wicked witch of the west, Orochimaru. He's a mean mofo. Don't let him have the shoes, okay?" she said to Kiba.

"He can have 'em! I don't want 'em!" Kiba yelled.

"Sucks for you!" she said. Then she waved her wand and both her and Orochimaru vanished. As soon they were gone, Konohamaru, Udon, Moegi, and Hanabi leapt out of the bushes and started to sing "Ding dong the wicked witch is dead!"

Akamaru yipped at Kiba. "Oh right. She did say we were supposed to follow the yellow brick road. There's one over there. I guess that's the one I'll take. C'mon' he said, and he and Akamaru started off.

Okay, there's the first chapter. Have any of you ever noticed how hard it is to write when someone keeps asking "Are you done yet? Are you done yet?". Any who, Maki, kiba in a dress is just for you. Next chapter: the scarecrow.

Ja'ne.


	2. Chapter 2

**I Don't think we're in Konoha anymore, Akamaru! **

**Chapter 2**

Heya peoples! Yay! I feel so loved by all the reviews. Aha ha. Two of you guessed that Kakashi would be the scarecrow. Well, that was a good guess, and it tempted me for a long time, but it is WRONG! As for who the scarecrow is, you will just have to see. And please forgive me if my memory of the film is a little shaky. I haven't seen it for a year and I never read the book. So anyways, happy reading!

Disclaimer: I own Naruto. Really, I do.

Naruto: No you don't. Stop lying.

No, I don't. Well, it was a good try anyways. But not really. I don't own Naruto or the Wizard of Oz. Frank L. Baum I'm not. So sad.

Kiba was strolling past corn fields, following the yellow brick road like Glinda told him to. At first the munchkins had tried to follow him, but when he knocked Udon out with a brick, that stopped pretty fast. Now he was all alone, except for Akamaru. Pretty soon he saw a fork in the road.

"Damnit, to borrow Shikamaru's word for it, this is troublesome. Which way am I supposed to go now?" He said to Akamaru.

"You should go to the left, little boy" someone near him whispered.

"HOLY CRAP! WACKO JACKO ALERT! STRANGER DANGER!" Kiba started flipping out, making Akamaru wonder if Kiba had completely taken leave of his sanity.

"Or you could go to the right. So long as I get a good view of your ass" the voice said again.

"WHO ARE YOU? WHERE ARE YOU?" Kiba screamed.

"Psst! Little boy! I'm over here!" the voice said. Kiba located the direction it was coming from. He looked up to see Kankuro sitting on the fence post. Kiba fell over.

"Jesus Christ! I knew you were a child-molester, but that's just creepy!" Kiba pointed and yelled. Kankuro looked hurt.

"Why does everyone always say that about me?" he turned away. A black cloud of despair formed above his head and started to rain on him, smearing his makeup.

"BECAUSE YOU JUST CAME ONTO ME, YOU ASS! AND YOU WEAR MAKEUP!" Kiba yelled.

"It's face paint, baka, FACE PAINT! F-A-C-E P-A-I-N-T." Kankuro yelled. Just then a swarm of crows descended from the skies and started attacking him.

Kiba laughed a that. Unfortunately, that attracted the attention of the murder of crows. Half of them flew over to him and ripped off his clothes. Akamaru stared, meanwhile, trying to figure out how he got to be smarter than his master.

Something finally scared the crows off and Kankuro and Kiba were left panting in the dirt, Kankuro with one of his eyes hanging out and Kiba in his boxers.

"You know what? You're one hella sucky scarecrow" Kiba spat. Kankuro scowled and popped his eye back in.

If you really must know, I have Avephobia" he sniffed.

"A SCARE CROW who is AFRAID of BIRDS" Kiba asked. "You know what, you're just stupid"

"I know." Kankuro sighed. "That's why I wish I had a brain. My life would be so much better" and then Kankuro burst into song, singing "If I only had a brain" at the top of his lungs but trailing off halfway through into las with random inserts of "If I only had a brain".

Kiba was by now completely convinced that Kankuro had gone bat-crap crazy, if he hadn't been already. He looked around for some sort of guidance. And that's when he saw the cue card conveniently hanging from the branch of a nearby tree.

"Oh, in that case you should go with me to go see the wizard. He will surely have a brain for you, and I can go home… What?" Kiba asked himself.

"What's that?" Kankuro asked as the cue card was switched.

"All we have to do is follow the yellow brick road." Kiba finished.

"YAY! I'll go with you, little boy!" Kankuro yelled and threw his arms around Kiba, who realized that not only did he really NOT want to go anywhere with Kankuro, he definitely didn't want to travel with him in his boxers.

"Um… look… you got any extra clothes on you?" Kiba asked, trying to pry Kankuro's arms off from around his waist, where the puppeteer was currently stuck like a starfish.

"Yes, actually!" Kankuro replied brightly. He rustled around in his shirt for a second and pulled out…

"A DRESS." Kiba said dangerously. "No thank you… wait, why do you carry that around with you?"

"It could be spandex" Kankuro pointed out. "Then again, I wouldn't mind a half naked traveling companion."

Kiba found himself extremely frightened by the look in Kankuro's eyes. "Ya know what? I like the dress a whole lot, suddenly" He went behind a tree to change, rather pointlessly, and all the while he cursed Temari's giant fan.

He came out about ready to kill anything that moved. Kankuro didn't notice this and glomped onto Kiba's arm.

"If you're going to come with me there are gonna be a few rules" Kiba said between pants as he pried Kankuro off himself again. "One of which is you don't get to touch me. The other is that if you sing again, I will strangle you with your own intestines"

Kankuro nodded eagerly. Kiba sighed. "Well, let's get going" he said. "C'mon, Akamaru. C'mon, scarecrow"

And so the newly formed trio set off down the yellow brick road again.

A little short, but I put Kiba in a dress again, so I don't want any complaints. The dress will be a reoccurring theme, in case anyone was wondering. It will get destroyed and resurrect. There is no stopping it. Oh, it's the same Dorothy dress, by the way. Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! And please place bets on who the Tin man, who comes in the next chapter is. Except you, Maki. You already know who he is- don't tell. Thanks for reading, and please review!


	3. Chapter 3

I Don't Think We're in Konoha Anymore, Akamaru! Chapter 3 

Hello, welcome to the third chapter, where we get to meet the scarecrow… no he isn't Itachi. Speaking of Itachi, I'm really sorry for making that joke… please don't come and find me. Oh, and the reason I picked Kankuro was because A. He saves Kiba in the manga when there's the whole Sasuke Retrieval arch and B. Because he has his creepy puppet thing that is called "Karasu" or "The Crow" (Dubbing makes me want to hurt things…) and I have an odd recollection of hearing him call it "Scarecrow" once in the 1st part of the Chunin exams. I liked the parallel it formed. Plus there are so many make-up jokes to be made… If I just insulted any rabid Kankuro fans out there, sorry in advance…().

I don't own Naruto or the Wizard of Oz. Stunning revelation, isn't it?

Kankuro, Kiba and Akamaru were walking along on their merry way, following the yellow brick road. Kiba asked Kankuro "Wait, so let me get this straight, if we go to see this Wizard of Oz, we can go home and you can get a brain?"

Kankuro looked at Kiba oddly "Yeah… that's what you said…"

Kiba replied "No, that's what I read off the cue cards…"

"What cue cards…?"

"The ones… never mind." Kiba sighed. His stomach gurgled. "I'm hungry"

"Oh, I know how we can get food! Look, there are some apple trees up ahead." Kankuro pointed. Kiba looked and saw a grove of apple trees.

"Hot damn! Works for me!" Kiba ran off, ignoring Akamaru's warning yip. Kankuro ran after him.

Kiba reached the trees first. He started climbing up one and picking the apples when-

"What are you doing in my tree?" Kiba nearly fell off his branch. He turned around to see Kakashi with a mad gleam in his eye. A moment later he was flying over the grove, a victim of "One Thousand Years of Pain".

He landed on his face, on the other side of the yellow brick road. He spat all the dirt and leaves out of his mouth. Then he looked up.

Shino was standing in front of him, wearing a bucket with part cut out to reveal his face on his head and a trash can over his mid section.

"Shino? What are you doing here?" he panicked. This place was getting weirder and weirder. And the absolute last person he wanted to see was Shino. It wasn't that he hated Shino, but he was deathly afraid of what he might do to him; Kurenai had put him in a dress, after all.

Shino muttered something through lips he was clearly keeping shut on purpose. Kiba leaned in closer to his mouth. "What, Shino?"

"Feed me whipped cream" (Maki, this is for you). "Over there" Shino barely moved, but managed to indicate a can of whipped cream on the stump next to him. "Can't move"

"What? Okay… whatever." Kiba walked over and picked up the can of whipped cream, shaking it. Shino opened his mouth expectantly. Kiba thought to himself "You can too move, you little…"

He started pouring whipped cream into Shino's mouth. (Keep in mind he's still in a dress). When he was done with the whole can, Shino got up. He made a big show of stretching.

"How can I ever repay you… whoa. You're a guy. Why are you in a dress?" Shino stared.

"GAH! Shut up! Why were you sitting there all helpless and taking advantage of my kindness to make me pour whipped cream into your mouth?"

"Well, partially because I rusted there-"

"HOW WOULD WHIPPED CREAM-?" Kiba decided he didn't want to know. He stopped talking. Shino, who had been talking over Kiba, continued.

"-Because I have no heart. I thought it was a good idea- tall dark and handsome, get all the girls… but now I read that girls like sensitive guys!" Shino looked upset behind his dark glasses, but started singing anyways. Kiba tried to find some excuse to leave, when he saw another cue card.

"You should come with me and the scarecrow to go to the wizard of Oz, so you… can get… a heart." He read. He looked at Shino's awestruck expression. "Shit, I read that out loud again…"

"Yes, I will come with you!" Shino said in a determined voice. Just then Kiba heard a noise coming from behind them. He turned around to see Akamaru dragging Kankuro by the ankle.

"Akamaru, what happened?" he asked. Akamaru sighed and started yipping to explain.

(Translation) "This idiot tried to get apples by taunting the guys who live in the trees. It worked pretty well, but he got knocked out by one. He has some in his pockets." Akamaru pointed with his paw to where a few apples were spilling out of Kankuro's pockets. Kiba picked up three and started eating.

As soon as he was done, he said to Akamaru "Come on, let's get going. Maybe we can leave these idiots here." And they ran.

Kankuro had been stirring for the past few minutes, and he sprang up and ran after them, yelling "Wait for me!" at the top of his lungs. Shino followed, although he was too cool to screech.

Done… nothing much to say except R&R.


	4. Chapter 4

I Don't Think We're in Konoha Anymore, Akamaru! Chapter 4 

The cowardly lion. Actually, Hikari got this right but oh well. I guess after Shino it was a bit obvious. All I can say is "Whipped cream". Kukuku. The thing with Shino being all dark and mysterious to get girls is modified from Eerie Queerie, the idea actually coming from a guy named Shino. Oh, yeah. I own no Naruto or Wizard of Oz.

They had just gotten out of the forest and onto the yellow brick road again, Kiba trying as hard as he might to escape the psychos behind him.

He had just made it to the road when he saw a poof of smoke appear on the roof of the cottage on the other side. Kankuro and Shino emerged from the trees behind him to see Orochimaru emerge from the smoke.

"Give me the shoes!" he yelled.

"You want the stupid ass shoes? Take 'em! See if I care!" Kiba replied.

"Playing hard to get, eh? I'll set your scarecrow on fire!" Orochimaru screeched.

"ARE YOU DEAF OR SOMETHING? I HATE THE FUCKIN' SHOES! TAKE THEM AND MAKE MY LIFE WORTH LIVING AGAIN!" Kiba was nearly at the point of ripping his hair out by the handfuls.

Orochimaru paid no attention to him, and proceeded to light his broom on fire and chase Kankuro around with it. Kiba, Shino and Akamaru watched, vaguely interested. They watched, and they watched, and they watched… for three straight hours.

"SAVE MEEEEEEEEE! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO SOMETHING!" Kankuro yelled.

"Alright, I'm bored now, but I'll be back!" the wicked witch screamed. Then he disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Well, that was interesting." Kiba said.

"THAT PSYCHO COULD HAVE KILLED ME!" Kankuro screeched.

"Let us continue down the yellow brick road." Shino said.

"Fine by me" Kiba said. The four started off down the yellow brick road again.

It wasn't long before they came to a forest. They were walking through the trees, Kankuro skipping along, when they heard a meep.

"What was that?" Kiba asked.

"It was probably a lion or tiger or bear" Kankuro replied. And then the three boys burst into song, and Akamaru attempted to remove his own head and bury it to relieve himself of the humiliation during the chorus.

A shaky voice called from between the trees "Ano… ano, I said that if…if you don't get out of my forest right now, I'll roar at you!"

Akamaru looked up. Thank god- sanity did still exist! Kiba also looked up. "Hinata-chan! What are you doing here?"

And there she was, wearing a lion costume (if you've seen the twelfth ending theme, the one with the dog costumes, imagine her dressed in that outfit, but altered slightly). She was poking her fingers together through the big paws.

"D-don't make me repeat myself! I'll- I'll roar at you!" Hinata said. Then she "meeped" again.

"Oi! Hinata-chan!" (and here's where I drag in my love of all things HinaNaru-related)

"NOT YOU!" Kiba yelled, pointing into the tree where Naruto was perched.

"Ah, it's a fox" Shino said wisely.

"Hinata-chan! Own these lamers!" Naruto shouted. (Y'know. Working in references to KH2, how sad…)

"Shut up!" Kiba yelled back. Naruto stuck out his tongue. Hinata was, of course, blushing.

"Bleah!" Naruto disappeared.

Kiba, meanwhile, was distracted by a sign that was once again hanging on a nearby tree. "Come with us… to the wizard of Oz… and you can get some courage… so you can ask Naruto out on a date" he read.

"Ano… would that really be okay?" Hinata asked, beet red.

"Yeah, sure! The more the merrier!" Kiba said happily. Hinata hadn't changed, at least. "There aren't any tigers or bears around here, are there?"

"Ano… no, not unless you count Ibiki or Mizuki" Hinata said.

"Cool! Then let's go!" Kiba said, pointing into the sunset.

Wow, I feel like this should be longer… longifying it time!

_Neji's Byakugan can see through trees, but can he see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch?_

_Neji: Because they were destined to?_

_NO! Because they have swirls of cinnamon sugar on every bite!_

Wasn't that educational, kids? This idea isn't mine- I got it off a picture and felt like sharing. Any who, there aren't really anymore people to guess who they are… unless you want to guess who the flying monkeys are…

Also, I don't own the movie and haven't see it in forever, so if someone would give me a summary, I would love you forever. Speaking of which, thanks Iruweenie! Sorry this one was so short and random. R & R!


	5. Chapter 5

Wow. Sorry I haven't updated in about a million years, but I've been working on another story. Damn screwy computer. Anyways, I couldn't remember what happened next in the movie, but now I do. So R&R. And thanks to whoever put this story on the Kiba C2 community. That was cool.

Chapter 5 

"I'm tired… I'm hot… I'm thirsty… I'm hungry…" Kankuro complained. Kiba was getting fed up with him, and even Shino's eyebrow was twitching dangerously. "I'm dirty… I'm sweaty… I don't want to walk anymore" Kankuro whined.

"SHUT UP! It isn't like we relish the thought of walking for another million miles anymore than you do" Kiba snapped.

Kankuro stopped, took a deep breath, drew himself up to his full height, and prepared for a temper tantrum like the world has never seen before.

Before he started to scream, Hinata squeaked and said "Look! It's the emerald city! We're nearly there!" Kankuro deflated like a popped balloon. Everyone looked at the huge green wall that had risen up in front of them. Surrounding it was a field covered with bright red poppies.

"We simply have to walk through this poppy field, it would seem" Shino added, crossing his arms.

"Right. Well, let's get started!" Kiba grinned, and set off down the yellow brick road again. He'd gotten about two steps along it when his eyes started to droop. He yawned loudly. "Well, we're nearly there. I can afford to rest for a bit." He said, plopping down in the midst of the poppies. Akamaru was already asleep.

Kankuro smiled lazily and laid down next to him. Hinata felt herself growing sleepier as well, and she laid down on the other side of the road and curled up.

Shino glared at all of them. Why the hell was this a good place to sleep when they were so close to the emerald city, where there were places to stay?

Meanwhile, Orochimaru was staring into a crystal ball and cackling to himself. "I'm so evil, evil, evil, evil" he sang.

**We are having technical difficulties. Please excuse this interruption.**

"WHOEVER GETS OUT THERE RIGHT NOW IN THEIR FAIRY OUTFIT GETS REWARDED WITH 500 BIG-BREASTED, BIKINI-CLAD WARRIOR WOMEN!"

**Our technical difficulties have been cleared up. Thank you for waiting.**

Jiraiya stomped out into the middle of the field, wearing his normal outfit but with fairy wings and a crown. He kicked Kiba in the side. Kiba woke up, swearing.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?" he yelled. "HANA, GO AWAY! I'M SLEEPING" he opened his eyes properly and started to look around. "Huh? Who are you? And why are you dressed as a fairy?"

"Asks the kid with the dress on" Jiraiya snorted. "Get up" then he flicked his wand and disappeared.

Kankuro stretched and yawned. Then he asked blearily "What happened?"

"This guy kicked me. It was weird. Let's get going" Kiba shrugged. Shino helped Hinata up, and they started off down the brick road again.

They got to the gate of the emerald city and Kiba banged on it. A small window opened and Shizune glared at them. "Ring the bell" she snapped, shutting the window. Kankuro yanked on the bell pull. Then he yanked on it again, and again. Then he started ringing the bell repetitively in quick succession. Shino yanked the bell pull out of his hands. The window opened again.

"YOU! Stop that this instant! Put down the bell pull right now!" Shizune hissed.

Shino glared back sulkily at her. "It wasn't me"

Shizune ignored him. "What do you want?"

"We want to see the wizard of oz"

"The wizard is too busy doing paper work. Go away"

"We've come so far!" Kiba stomped his foot.

"Absolutely out of the- hey, are you wearing a dress?" Shizune asked. Kiba opened his mouth furiously. "You can come in, then"

And so the group shrugged and watched as the gates to the emerald city opened.

Hello! Sorry it took me so long. Anyways, review. Now I have to go. I am being chased by Jiraiya, as I lied about having the 500 large-breasted, bikini-clad warriors.

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


End file.
